Yo, I know it’s been awhile! So for the past three months I have been transitioning into a vegan lifestyle. This lifestyle has been of my interest since high school, but lacking the resources and information on how to begin has prolonged the beginning of my journey until now.
The beginning of this semester I eliminated meat and dairy from my diet. A bit insane you think? This was the perfect time to begin because I live off campus now and have my own space and funds to make these decisions. My roommate happened to be a vegetarian, so there wasn’t much temptation around the house!
As most, being a broke college student I was concerned about the financial aspect of veganism. I discovered that it’s extremely affordable shopping at Aldi! Naturally, I had a few mishaps with eating products that contains dairy and ate fish a few times (vegan twitter would rant about that).
This lifestyle is helping me become more conscious of the foods and products I choose to put in and on my body. As it has a positive impact on the environment, my physical, mental and spiritual health. I still have a lot to learn, but I can offer tips and resources on how you can begin your journey. However, keep in mind that it’s essential to go at your own pace and discover what works best for you.
- Quinoa, pinto beans, sautéed spinach, avocado on toasted wheat wrap.
- Organic spinach leaves, organic arugula, cucumbers, green peppers, onion, and avocados with garlic vinaigrette dressing.
- Kale, banana, blueberries, almond milk, ice & flax seeds.
I realized how much I’ve been affected by depression and anxiety ever since I transferred to this university. At my previous university, I held three leadership positions. I was actively involved in different organizations. I developed and maintained multiple meaningful connections. I was extremely focused. I studied for long periods of time and my gpa was superb. My dorm was near a beach and a small park and I’d walk through there several times a week. I felt at peace and truly happy. I never felt so free and completely proud of myself. However, my biggest concern was the price of tuition and how much debt I would accumulate after graduating. That’s when I think I got a little ahead of myself and thought I needed to further my academic pursuits elsewhere.
So, I decided to transfer after the completion of my first year. The university that I’m at now is two times the size of my previous one. It’s definitely much more affordable. I figured this would be a perfect opportunity for me to challenge myself and step even further out of my comfort zone. I can admit it has definitely been one of the most challenging transitions. I’m almost done with my second semester here and I’m still struggling to find my place within this university. Several conflicts outside of school contributed to this displacement as well.
I try not to have any regrets, but this one is going to be the toughest to let go of. Right now I’m trying to focus on alleviating stress and seek opportunities that’ll help me get back to that stellar, confident, enthusiastic and motivated girl I was. I know she’s still there and will excel at this university. She’s going to blossom into an even more outstanding student and person. She’s slowly coming back. I’m being patient with her.
I never used to like holding hands
because they would always get clammy from the nervousness
but to feel the warmth & closeness of another person
is all I’ve ever desired because of you.
you’d trace your fingertips across my face & stare deeply into my eyes
the most intimate I’ve ever been
& I’ve been searching for that same feeling ever since
you loved so gracefully
with your whole heart & soul, unconditionally.
at the time I wasn’t able to fully express how much you meant to me
but I thought you could see how my eyes lit up whenever you entered the room
I thought you could hear my heart pumping rapidly underneath my shirt whenever I kissed you
I thought you could feel the fire you ignited within my soul whenever you hugged me
I thought you could smell the scent of bitterness escape every broken part of me you’ve touched
I guess that just wasn’t enough
I know you deserved to be told every morning how golden you are.
the love I have for you will never depart
no matter the distance or how far we’ve grown apart
a letter to a love lost.
toughest times sparked my greatest creativity
so I never abhor my tribulations because they always revealed the best parts of me
best parts of me that were hard to see
hidden beneath insecurities,
analyzed the societal lies & prophecies.
which led me closer to my godly.
I had to keep digging deep
until it soared & seeped through me.
I’ve always been drawn to spoken word, poetry, music and anything artsy related. It’s given me the opportunity to use words to create poems in ways I’ve never imagined myself being capable of. It gave me the opportunity to freely be me. There were no rules, structure, or boundaries. And that’s what I’ve loved the most. But, being very financially poor I thought I didn’t have much of a choice to pursue other routes that would financially benefit my future. This deterred me from continuing my poetry journey several times. However, I keep finding my way back to it and I don’t want to depart this time. I want to take it more seriously and continue to grow in my writing.
I loved being born and raised in NYC because there was inspiration everywhere. My biggest inspiration, I’d never forget it, came from a woman of color sharing her song on the train ride. Her locs were past her shoulders covered with a black faux leather fedora hat. She had combat boots spray painted with silver and her whole style was dope! “Everybody is in a rush, just slow it down.” She sang that tune & it stuck with me the entire night. I definitely gave her the little bit of change I had left in my pocket because there was no way that I’d let her go without supporting her.
After she was done she said her name and where we can follow her social media site. I didn’t fully hear her entire stage name so I went home that night searching every social media site to find her but I didn’t have any luck. I just kept thinking wow, one day I want to be confident enough to share my poems with the world. I kept singing that tune and went to bed in awe. I found her on Instagram several months later and again I revisited that same inspirational feeling I felt that day.
I gotta dig deeper.
Where vulnerability is no longer my fear but my path to pure bliss.
Where my heart is fully open to love.
Where my past doesn’t allow me to play victim whenever someone comes along.
Where negativity sits by the tide but doesn’t move me offshore.
Where happiness exists outside of the materialistic things.
Where my mind & body is relaxed, not affected by anxiety.
I gotta dig deeper, for all I desire is already within me.